New Body

So long time, no post. Mostly because the memory card on the camera being out of commission while I figure out how to get the deleted photos back has prevented my picture taking. I guess I've always viewed my photography as an academic endeavor, a need-to-know, an enjoyable skill... I didn't know how much I loved it until I couldn't do it anymore. Doesn't absence really make the heart grow fonder?

However, I have taken photos on my phone! A centipede, Kiah (the dog I house-sat), an African Band at Sky Bar, a band called Coyote Grace at Congress, a band called Fishbone at the Rialto, a classic factory, a spoon I invented, cabochan pins I also invented, this could go on awhile... I've been getting around I guess. Lot's of music lately, which is great. It's too bad my hard-drive ran out of space to put more music on it. Humbug.

Tomorrow I'm off to San Diego, to study the great wonders of the sea with my marine bio class. It will be nice... healing.. to see the ocean again. My heart yearns for it pretty perpetually. I miss many things right now. I miss the way everything used to be, I'm uncomfortable. I've also reluctantly accepted that this is the beginning of a new phase of my life. A good phase, it'll be.. maybe the best yet, so I should be not only open but excited for it. That's all hard to grasp much of the time. Little moments of shine tell me about it though, poking me like pins, filling me with butterflies, inspiring me and making me smile when I'm alone.

Current favorites: boyz in the hood, oliver's army, i've got the cure, shoulda took acid with you.

Little Picks

In my venture to continue procrastinating my genetics studies for as long as possible, I thought it would be fun to look a little more in-depth at my little playlist on here. A few reasons for this: I've picked the songs to go with the theme/mood of the blog, which doesn't always match up, but they're all good nonetheless; It's quite probable that anyone who reads this gets annoyed when music they don't know/don't like/are not in the mood for/that conflicts with their music starts playing and they stop it immediately (or just navigate away...:P); I'll most likely change it after I write this. Without further ado, Little Picks, in order of addition to the list:

1. Van Morrison's "Tupelo Honey"

ever so classic, light but deep, beautiful, intense personal meaning

2. Death Cab's "The Sound Of Settling"
really fits, happy-with-what-you-have, great rhythm, one of the band's best


3. Elvis Costello's "Allison"
adorably sincere, moving melody, grungyish sound, tugs at you


4. Jason Mraz's "Bella Luna"
bossa nova style, flawless singing, sexy


5. Simon and Garfunkel's "The Sound Of Silence"
ridiculously emotive, gorgeous harmonies, life's soundtrack


6. Grizzly Bear's "Two Weeks"
nod to the beach boys, classic voice, passive and mellow


7. The Yeah Yeah Yeah's "Maps"
absolutely changed my life and is also the only song by this band I like


8. Chairlift's "Bruises"
perfect amount of bouncy, lyrical innuendos, too cute


9. The Everly Brothers' "All I Have To Do Is Dream"
it's...well... dreamy. and soupy. licking ice cream cones in a 50's diner


And indeed, I did shamelessly steal these photos from the web without citing sources, but I wouldn't steal from artists. Okay, I'd at least link to the artist, but these have been reproduced a trillion times so that info's hidden under mountains of sites.

http://www.youaintnopicasso.com/2009/06/17/chairlift-bonnaroo-61109/

The Apple

On occasion, a great idea drops down from the clouds (yes, there are usually clouds involved when these things happen) and into my head, like a little stroke of genius, like a eureka and all that jazz. And on such occasions, I never have the little-idea-book-to-carry-around that was another old epiphany I had just for this purpose. But that's probably because of what I was about to say, which is that these amazing ideas rarely come to fruition. And that is partly because I forget them... viciously cyclical much? Where's that idea book? You'd think I would've learned my lesson by now. But when I do remember them, I still have a hard time starting them. I spend a lot of time "gearing up" but seem to spin my wheels in this phase.

Here is my newest idea, fresh off the press: I will post some here, so I will both (1) not forget, and (2) look dumb when they haven't come to pass (cause you know I'd post about it) which will hopefully kick my butt into changing that state of affairs.

Great Ideas I've Had:

1. Create an animal training internship for myself by design and commitment to acquiring skill, and convince one of my connex to let me do it. Like Dillon. Or some dog-training school. Yesss.....

2. Do a research project in the Biosphere II ocean. If I have the means, there is really no excuse for a missed opportunity there.

3. Begin being an Earth Advocate (I just made that up) in the form of hate-mailing companies that use excessive and/or non-recyclable plastics, especially in food packaging. I'm reeeally passionate about plastic (don't know why that in particular, but we all get our cookies somehow). Maybe I should also send love-letters to companies doing a good job.

4. Go to Vancouver. Live there.

That's all I can think of right now. Blogging is such a great way to feel productive without actually doing anything. But finding pearls where there seem to be none is important too. Goals are definitely pearls, little morsels of ambition. I took that photo up there about a year ago roughly, just a little bit of art that doesn't mark my current progress at all. Now back to crying over my lost trip photos.

Morning Adventure

I wake up, and after a night of the club and subsequent homemade vodka-cranberrys, I'm surprised I feel as well as I do. My bed buddy is nowhere to be found.

Let me set the stage. I'm at a friend's sister's house (sister is in Phoenix seeing Lady Gaga), because I hadn't seen this friend in long enough that she still wanted me to come out despite getting off at 12:00pm, and would buy my penniless ass drinks and a cab for the evening. Cab back to her house, that is, with 2 male friends of hers. All 3 were well inebriated when I got there, with one buying round upon round of kamikazes. Interesting evening but everyone here knows Maloney's sucks both as a bar and a dance club. So those two pass out on the couch while my friend and I do some (most likely deathly) gymnastics, and we eventually go to sleep at 4am in the sister's room.

These sisters and their friends should all be models. They're gorgeous, blonde, tall, stylish and ridiculously more... magazine-y?... than I am. It isn't that I don't like to look good, but I usually don't justify spending time or money on it. Their house is a wonderland of girl.

Fast-forward again, to the part where my friend (who rises at the crack of dawn no matter what) has vanished leaving not a trace. I get up and use the restroom. Very messy, which means no one notices a little rifling through their makeup bags... uh oh. I give my face a full wash and a carrot infusion followed by toner and moisturizer. But I can't stop there though, I put on some concealer and follow it with each step of Bare Minerals powders, a little eye makeup, and the 4 different glosses I'd put on the night before were still shining!

To change my clothes I had to go into the other bathroom - let me note there is Bath & Body Works stuff all over the place, which I absolutely looove, but I'd liberally helped myself the night before again, so I still reeked of it - and under the cabinet I found Biosilk. Uh-oh. This crap is amazing. Gotta get me some. Hair-a-shinin' (and smelling like heaven), I step out into the living room. I'm pretty dehydrated, so I begin my self-nursing with water and an orange I find. I must find something to do, I'm getting so bored. My phone is dead, but I notice a Blackberry on the table - sweet! There must be a charger around here.

My search yielded no charger, but there was a USB cord with the right other end, so I set out for a computer. Again, luck! A little laptop plugged into the bookshelf! "Bookshelf" is better, the books on it consisted of a little black book, Twilight, a Luanne Rice novel (I'll have to explain my *shakeshead* at that later) and God knows what other few abominations to literature they own. Unfortunately, my plan didn't work out cause the "charger" didn't have enough voltage output. So I'm on the floor looking at other things on this shelf. What is this device in a pink leather case? Lights on the end? Buttons? Is this a pager? I pull it out of the case and read: Pink Cheetah, 1,000,000 v. Uh-oh, almost tased myself. It's only 8am. Maybe I should just read that fucking Twilight book.

Like A Rolling Stone

I watched the Martin Scorsese film 'Shine A Light,' after buying it for ~$3.00 in a clearance sale. It's documentary style, following the Rolling Stones around before and during a big show in NYC. Guest appearances include Jack White, Christina Aguilera, Buddy Guy, and even Bill Clinton.

Intermittently, clips are inserted from interviews that originate from the beginning of their stardom to now. Those were the most interesting part, in my opinion, however the only criticism I had with the film was that only bits about the Stones' longevity as a band were included. E.g.: 'Why do you still do this?' and 'Did you ever think you'd make it this far?' and 'Have you ever thought about quitting?' - when to me, those questions have obvious answers. They do it because they love it, it's a passion and a lifestyle. No, they probably never thought it would get this big or last this long, but one can dream. And yes, we all think about quitting at some point. Mick himself said that he was tired of being asked. "It's a stupid question." I'd like to know more interesting things: the band's funniest memory, stories from on tour, trouble-making, family dynamics (were touched on slightly), things like that.

That being said, a few beauties of the video stood out. The music was great, of course, those guys still have it (even though they played 0 of my favorite songs). The cinematography was excellent and I loved the up close and behind-the-scenes shots. Lastly, seeing Mick Jagger young was a startling aesthetic surprise I wasn't expecting - though he's a kind of funny looking old dude now, he was a super cutie back in the day! I tried to find a picture of the smile, but mostly my search returned sultry looks. Albeit, here's my tributary collage... isn't youth wonderful?

Biosphere II: The Final Frontier

This will be the first of a slew of postings related to 'what I do'. I recently began a 'journal' of Biospherian adventures. That is, what sorts of things I get up to when I'm there: projects, education, events, research... the exciting and the mundane. Although I've worked there for about 2 years now, I never kept a log like this. Thus I sanctioned the first couple pages for remembering what I've done. At a place like the Biosphere II, we as student workers get so many opportunities for resume material that it can become a big blur and things do get forgotten.

If you've never checked it out, you should. It is in Oracle, Arizona, and there are visitors from all over the world. I can't rattle off all the statistics about it a guide could, but I can firmly say that the place is amazing, and in many ways. It's an architectural wonder; the engineering that went into it is so cool. The entire structure is comprised of glass panes and white trusses, giving it a surreal futuristic feel.

For example, this spiral staircase, from the side, and a birds-eye view.

Or just tell me this isn't Stonecutters!

A tour would start in the kitchen shown above and take you through each of the 5 biomes - rainforest, ocean, grassland savannah, desert scrub, and marshland - and then wind you through the basement and into a lung. Each of the biomes is independently controllable for temperature, humidity, rain schedule and wind. Pictures of them are to come in a future post. Here is the Biosphere II from the outside.

The three arches you see above were once the agricultural area for the original missions (which are not still going, if you were wondering). The Biosphere II is now being used as a scientific space for educating and researching all things Earth-related. Biology, Atmospheric Science, Geology, Plant Science, Chemistry, you name it. It is a great for bridging the gap between small, controlled lab experiments and large, real-world multi-factorial experiments that are harder to control. The Hillslope Experiment will be built in that area now: a ten year study on water runoff and it's geomorphological and chemical impacts on transects of variously composed/stratified soils and plants.

It is under construction and they are bringing dirt in.
Here is some of the basement and the lung!

Welcome to the spaceship! I'm just having a ball, aren't I?


There are two lungs. They are special rooms designed for pressure expansion and contraction. When the Biosphere II was closed off completely, a rubber roof in here prevented explosion when the air got hot and expanded. Great acoustics!

The Energy Center has circle windows!! It's where all the generators, water circulation/filtration, electricity, etc go through. Highly technical.

The casita "village" is a cute aggregation of tiny houses for people to stay at during conferences and visiting research projects.

Lastly, this is one of the things I do when I'm there: educational demos to teach people something about science and conservation!

Far Away Places

"It's been hard to be strong with all of this going on." - Away With Murder

Every day starts with some hardcore positivity training, it has to. I do my warmup and practice Kung Fu for a little while. They say exercize makes people happy. I know Kung Fu changes my entire day. I'm more energetic, calm, less anxious and figety, definitely more centered. Happiness? Well it at least makes me less emotional, which is good for me. We'll call it a natural anti-depressant, what could be better? I also remove external factors that could weigh on me - i.e. things are tidy, projects are finished or stashed - so I can be free to do what I want, not what I have to. Rosko and my plants are made happy.

"But if the blood pumping through my veins could freeze, like a river in Toronto, then I'd be pleased." - Forests and Sands

I'm planning to go to Vancouver next summer for an internship. I have to get out of here! I say it every summer but this Tucson heat sucks the life out of me. In fact, it's been one year I've had this blog now, and it was started just to look on the bright side, to find the pearls under the wreckage, if you will. Sometimes I have to remember that. I've been jealous of the Northwest photos I've been seeing too. What I wouldn't give for just a little rain. And the forest is like a dreamworld I could find gnomes and faeries in. I may end up there eventually - Washington or Oregon - with the forest and the Puget Sound (Orca whales!) I could be in heaven, and not ridiculously far from family.

"When you're lucid, you're the sweetest thing..." -The Sweetest Thing

Tonight was good though. I made a new Indian recipe for Coconut Pulav (rice dish) and Aloo Kurma (a potato curry) which turned out to be absolutely devine, if I may be so modest. I give credit to Madhu's Vantalu, she's quite incredible.

Today's lyrics were brought to you by Camera Obscura's latest album, My Maudlin Career. My new favorite band.

Flying North

Clouds are not spheres, mountains are not cones,

coastlines are not circles and bark is not smooth,
nor does lightning travel in a straight line.
- Benoit Mandelbrot

My day was spent packing and cleaning for a friend leaving town, so tonight's post is in honor of a special person: Korbin Bennett-Gold. In my attentions, he began as an underclassman I didn't know among the drama kids in high school. Years later, as brother of my friend at the movies, which eventually became brother of my boyfriend. The tides of time come in and out and I now find it true to say Korbin's become a friend of my own, albeit an unconventional one thus far.

Korbin loves to create. He's very into film-making, music connoisseuring, decorating and mixed-media art. He's got a zealous appreciation for nature and people and loves to be in the spotlight. He was, in fact, one of the original inspirer's of this blog, having once asked me what kind of adventures I had. He's years younger than myself, and that does manifest in a lot of ways, but age is a funny thing when you see that it means nothing about a person. Years, what are years? Blinks of an eye. As people age, they only become deeper and more complex and beautiful. Like a fractal. And as for what matters, it's rare to come upon someone who's as kindred in spirit to me as he is.

Most of the time you don't consider the influence of (who seem to be) the smaller role characters in your world. My first goodbye was speechless in both senses of the word. The second I did at least manage to say the most important thing, but again I dumbly lost the words I wanted. I tend to think people don't usually care as much as I do, but I realize now that I nearly never tell anyone my own opinion of them. I gave it thought. Here, though I don't normally labor over words, is what I forgot to say:

I'd been in a horrendously boring rut creatively for a long time post-high school. I must've gotten so used to using art/music therapeutically that when I moved out on my own, left dark places behind and released that pain, I lost my art too.. and hence an important part my soul. It's strange I let it go for so long without knowing what was happening. But the piece I'd lost, if I picked it up, stretched it and molded it in my hands into the shape of a human, I think it would certainly have your name..
I say this because your aura is powerful and permeating - the people around you can feel it. I really can't give a high enough value to seeing the physical apparition of what I knew was missing in me when I so needed a change. To having had an example set for me of someone who unabashedly flaunts their beautiful selves and all the things they are, splashing onto everything, who brings people together, who spreads music and art and love and spontaneity without heed to what will come of it or who'll like it. We should all get in touch with that spice inside us. Living in the moment and viewing life as the beauty and joy that surrounds you is what makes you glow. That is the ultimate happiness, no matter what's going on.. never ever change that. I don't believe the particular people in your life are there coincidentally, so thank you, Korbin, for being an inspiration and always so bright. I am lastingly lighter.

I hope (and know) it'll all go well in Washington! You'll have epic adventures and make new friends and continue learning and growing. I'll come see the pretty place you'll be living (maybe I'll hand-deliver your next scarf). It's sad to see you go, strikingly so... I've built up a big fondness for you. But it's also vicariously exciting to watch you start a new chapter - I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little envious. Have safe travels, keep shining

Goodbye Raptor Free Flight

It's slowly sinking in that my 2-year weekly volunteer job has given to my life in a huge way and that I, sadly, will not be returning in the fall.
Every Sunday I went to the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum, where I volunteered for the Raptor Free Flight program. Last school year (September to April) was my first season, and this year made my second. On Sundays there is a lovely crew of girls I got to work with: Heather, Chantal and Rita. We've been co-volunteers for both seasons.

So what is Raptor Free Flight? It's a demonstration of native birds and raptors flying free in the desert! Well, not quite that simple. The birds are released and fly over a specific range they've been trained to stay in. Some birds do a lot of soaring, others mostly fly from one snag to another. All are impressive and beautiful. They get rewarded for landing in the right place with a bit of meat ("tidbits," I love this word), and thus they are positively reinforced as the method of training.

Behind the scenes, the birds stay in the "mew" and are cared for exceptionally by the staff and volunteers.

Their weights are meticulously tracked multiple times per day.

The equipment: hoods and jesses.

Rita in front of the old male barn owl, and Heather/Chantal cleaning an enclosure.

Male Great Horned Owl in the flight enclosure - my favorite bird ever.
Let's see these birds in action! Due credit goes to Heather for the following fabulous pictures.

Great Horned Owl again.

Harris' Hawks: Elegant flyers and graceful landers.

Scarlet Macaw in flight training.

Ravens - birds who are too smart for their own good :P

This is the male Barn Owl, literally light as a feather.

The Ferruginous Hawk is the largest hawk in North America. Being trained to handle this one was my big victory this season.

Grey Hawk, a very cute bird. I mean.... vicious predator... with a uhh... piercing scream. That's it.

Roadrunner. I think this photo may be my favorite Heather took at RFF.

I'll miss RFF, surely. It has taught me so much in terms of animal handling and training, working with many different types of people, patience in all areas, natural history of the Sonoran Desert and the true natures of birds. I have an appreciation for birds I couldn't, and would not, have gotten from anywhere else. On top of all of that, I have it to thank for the three close friendships with amazing people I now have and know will last.